i have never been close to my brother. i always thought he was a jerk. he went to live with our dad when i was 12 (he was 14), and we pretty much lost touch. he spent the next 40 years using a variety of drugs and becoming even more of a jerk. the way he treated his kids and wives always angered me and continued to build my resentment.
i have always reached out to his kids — remembered their birthdays, had them visit during the summers, encouraged them and given them a place to go during their own struggles, and generally tried to be a loving aunt.
in 61 years, my brother has never reached out to me to ask about my life, my family, my struggles, or tried to get to know me. he is mean, petty, and we could not have more differing values. pretty simply, i just don't like him as a person.
i always wanted a big brother — one who would look out for me, lend advice, and just be there for me. one who could help me support our elderly parents. or just one who gave a sh*t about someone or something other than himself.
people always say, "at least you have a brother, you should be thankful" — should i?